I drove home with my mind was preoccupied with a lot of things, most importantly was my wife’s reaction to my gross immoral conduct and dismissal. I was striving to be a popular pastor to the of detriment my family. I had not been a good husband yet my wife tolerated me and put up a good attitude in public to avoid any suspicion. She made it clear to me whenever I hurt her that she was still in the marriage for the sake of our son and her parents. She had kept secret my bad behaviour towards her. There are times that I called her names when she refuses to give me the third round of sex out of fatigue. These insults made her cry all night. Juanita my wife had been a good wife; she respected me and tried her best to satisfy my excessive demands. I took away her social life and made her a lonely wife. The big question on my mind was, “What will Juanita do after hearing that I cheated on her and that has led to my dismissal from the church as a pastor?”
When I got home, my wife was sitting on the sofa with teary eyes, my guess was that her friend Elizabeth had told her something. I dropped my bag on the floor and knelt down before her and with the deepest regret, I said to her,
“Juanita I am sorry for all that I have done. Please forgive me.” “Sammy, what have you done?” She asked me politely, “My dear wife I am responsible for Miriam’s sudden departure. I forcefully had sex with her and as a result, she disappeared that very night. The consequence of my action made her pregnant and she now has a baby girl.”
Juanita stood up with a clenched fist and yelled, “you wicked man, Sammy you are soo heartless!”
I attempted holding her feet but she shouted at me “don’t you dare touch me with your filthy hands!”.
For the first time, I felt her anger like burning coal.
“Juanita, I have done terrible things and I am sincerely sorry, I am responsible for the leaking of Pastor Sammy’s wife’s sex video in the church, the child of Mrs Boahene is mine, these things are no longer secret in the church. Juanita, I have been dismissed, I am sorry for dragging you into this mess.”
My words were like swords being pierced into her heart. My wife screamed and wept bitterly, our son woke up and run to the mum, he did not understand what was going on but also started crying.
She said to me, “After all the pain you have caused me since we got married, you made me feel like a slave in my own house. Your arrogance and domineering character caused me so much agony but in all these, I was praying and hopeful that you will come home to your senses, I had never on any occasion discussed our marital problems with anybody, not even my parents because I loved you Sammy and cherished our marriage. Sammy is this result of my sacrifice?”
At that moment it was clear to me I had hurt my wife greatly. Tears poured down my face like a waterfall. She became quiet and went inside the bedroom with the child. The following morning, my wife did not respond to my greetings when I greeted her nor did she make any attempt to communicate with me.
I decided to go and hand over the Church’s document and my office key to Pastor Derick. When I got to him in the house, for the first time, Pastor Derick gave me a straight face, his responses were rather short and straightforward. I knelt down before him to apologise for being the chief architect behind the circulation of his deceased wife’s sex video. Pastor Derick felt betrayed and poured out his heart to me,
“Sammy, you are indeed ungrateful. What did we do to deserve this kind of ruthless treatment from you of all people, we made you part of our family and supported you from the days of your joining the church, throughout Bible school till now, is this the best way to show your appreciation. My wife would always ask of you and your family and insist you were given the best of care. There was no single occasion she will travel and will come back without a gift for you and your family. She loved you and took you as a brother. Sammy, you have deeply stubbed me in the back. Did you really receive a calling from God to serve in the ministry?”
He gazed at the wife’s portrait on the wall intensely and continued,
“Sammy you took my joy and companion from me. I am not God to judge you, I have forgiven you and I wish you well, please get up and leave”
I got up in shame, handed over the things in my custody and left. On my way back to check on my mother, I had a call from Mrs Boahene, I sensed more trouble and stopped at a bus stop to chat with her. Mrs Boahene panting as if she was running away from death, said anxiously
“Pastor Sammy, I am finished! my husband has gotten to know about our affair and the fact that he is not the father of my child. The child and I were driven out of the house this morning.”
She began weeping and asking me what she was going to do to save her marriage. I was lost in the conversation and could not make any sense to her. I told her the harm has already been done and that she should just fall on elders in her family to help her beg Mr Boahene. She told me about something which frightened me the more. “Pastor Sammy my husband has threatened to deal with you in a way that you will never forget. Please take care of yourself; my husband can be callous when he is mad.”
I anxiously asked, “What could be the worst thing he could do, will he kill me?” Whiles still weeping she replied “I don’t know Pastor Sammy, as I speak to you I have bruises all over my body with swollen cheeks and blurred vision. My husband beat me mercilessly before throwing us out of the house. He took back the car he gave me. I am currently living with my mom at Medina.”
In my distress, I managed to console her and ended the conversation with her.
Things were beginning to fall apart, I got home to meet an empty house, my wife had gone to work and as usual, dropped off our son at school. I sat on the floor immediately after entering the room and cried over my woes asking God to intervene. My mum called me to console me. She asked me how my wife had taken the matter and encouraged me to continue to pray for God to take control of the situation.
Sitting on the floor, I had a lot of sinister motives coming into my mind. I said to myself “If I die all these issues will stop haunting me and my family” I wanted to commit suicide, I went to the bathhouse grabbed a bottle of parazone, a washing and bleaching liquid, held it in my hands and was about drinking it then my phone rang. It was my mother-in-law. I reluctantly picked up the call and without even exchanging greetings with me she said,
“Well done Sammy, thank you for bringing disgrace to our family. You don’t deserve to be with our daughter, shameless adulterous man. You will soon hear from us”, after pouring her anger, she hung up on me.
It was not too long, I heard a knock on the door, when I opened the door to see who it was, standing at the door were my parents. My mum and dad came to check on me. My mum saw the parazone in my hand and began screaming at me,
“Sammy, what were you going to do? Do you want to bring more disgrace to our family by taking your life, do you think that will solve the problem? Please, you are a man, be strong, you cannot reverse what had happened. God will surely see you through although it will not be easy”
My dad continued “My son, I am not happy with you at all but I don’t wish you to perish in this situation. The mess you have created is not the end of the world. Put yourself together, you have served the Lord and must trust Him to forgive you and strengthen you to go through this challenge.”
Since I started working as a Pastor, I had not paid much attention to my family. I hardly visit them. I was lucky to have my mum attend the same church but for my father and siblings, I saw them once in a blue moon. I had seen the importance of having parents. My parents, regardless of the situation still loved me and gave me hope. I was at the point of committing suicide but for their timely visit, I was given the reason to still hold on no matter situation. My mum went to the kitchen and prepared rice and stew for lunch. Sincerely, I lost my appetite but she managed to encourage me to eat. I was grateful to God for the lives of my parents. Parents are like the well, you never seize drinking from it till it dries out.
Later in the evening, my wife and child came to meet my parents. Apparently, my boy was excited to see the grandparents around, he run to hug the grandmother. Juanita however was not in the mood to speak to anyone but my mother called her to sit down so that we could have a conversation. She concurred and sat down to listen to them.
“My daughter” my father called her gently, “We have all heard and seen what our son has done to you, and indeed we are all disappointed and not in support of him. We have come to plead on his behalf, please forgive his irresponsible deeds”
My wife replied, “Papa, thank you for the visit, I am unable to say much now, when I am done deciding what to do about the matter, I will let you know. Please excuse me, I have some assignment from work to take care of.”
My wife stood up and entered the bedroom. My parents after a short while returned home. We went through another night of silence, our child ignorantly had no idea what was going on. He was shuttling between us seeking attention.
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